Cathy Sepia, Director of Grass Valley Pregnancy Center,

At the Grass Valley Pregnancy Center Gala, Cathy Sepia is introducing Bruce Wilkinson. His message was strong.

We will be sending out my book, Spirit of the Red Candle, journal of Mary Magdalene.

This book is all about forgiveness, freed and fearless. This book will be an answer to many women who have made the choice to abort their baby and living with the shame and guilt of that choice. We are excited we can help these women and girls to become forgiven, freed and fearless

Mikey, my market coach and I was paddling in the deep water for a few weeks. He was waiting for me. I needed to get a clear direction on what I felt passionate about. It determined where the book, Spirit of the Red Candle, journal of Mary Magdalene, needed to go.

In Grass Valley, the window flew open and I could see clearly.

This book needed to be in the Pregnancy Centers in our country. If there have been 54 million abortions in the United States since 1972, when the Law was passed for abortions, then there are 54 million women who are dealing with post abortive guilt and shame. Many carry the burden of this choice, and some have stuffed the thought deep within their soul.

Spencer White on location for filming my video for Spirit of the Red Candle, journal of Mary Magdalene

We started making strides in the direction where this book needs to go. My grandson videoed one testimony of one woman who chose life.

Carla and daughter Brooklyn – Carla speaks out for Pro-Life

The Pagosa Springs Library has Spirit of the Red Candle as a new release on their book display table.

I had to take a picture. I have always said this book had a life of its own. It will go where it wants. I am hearing people loving this book so much they are sending it to their daughter or giving it to a friend. These are small steps, but I’m trusting the Holy Spirit is moving this book into the hands who needs to read it. I don’t want to put flesh on this. As he leads, then I am faithful to move on it.

My book is on the New Fiction Display Table.

This is where my book is. Hope it stays out, comes in and goes out again.

How am I selling it? One book at a time.

“I woke up frustrated. I had three calls this week wanting private painting lessons. In my mind, been there, done that. I have evolved. I am now a writer. I am not there anymore. I’m too busy with this book and thinking about the next book.

At breakfast, I wanted to talk about it and thought Al would understand. I should have known I was talking to the wrong person. I began, “I’ve evolved, time has evolved, and what I want to do has evolved. I teach two days a week at Wyndham and I have other things to do. These people want me to take chunks of my time and teach them to paint. Where were they when I wanted to teach? They didn’t value me back then.”

Al said, “If they want a lesson, I think you should teach them. You could make a few dollars. I don’t see a problem.”

“You don’t understand. I have evolved. I am now a writer.”

“Betty, you have a talent and you are going to lose it if you don’t stay in it. Besides, I asked you to paint a duck landing on the water. I found a beautiful picture of ducks on the water, and I asked you to paint it a long time ago, and you haven’t.”

“I don’t have time. I am marketing this book.”
“I’ll never get a duck painting.” Al pouted.

I opened up a can of worms. I defended myself. “I painted a pheasant painting for you. I’ve painted portraits of all your dogs. Wasn’t that enough?”

Then Al brought up another pet peeve. “And besides, you are always on the computer. If you would stay off the computer, you would have time to paint.”

That was the way the day began and continued. Mikey, my marketing coach called. I thought if anyone could understand, he would. He is a part of all this social marketing I’m doing on the computer. I told Mikey my tale of woe. He listened patiently. Then he said, “Are you through whining? Your problem is in you.  You have de-valued your gift. You do not respect the gift in your hands.”

“No, it’s not like that.  It’s everyone else who doesn’t value my worth.”

Then Mikey continued, “I told you a year ago that your art would dwarf your book. You didn’t believe me. Your art will be a big part of your success.”

“I’m not there today. I’m ready to go on.”

Mikey didn’t give in. “This is your assignment. Spend a half hour before the Lord. Think about why the Lord put gold in your hands. Don’t think about it as being gold, think of it as purpose in your hands and what God wants you to do with it.  Also, think about the purpose of teaching others and what you are giving. Remember, the Provision is always in your presence.”

“I guess I can do that.” I said reluctantly.

Before we hung up, he said, “And paint the ducks for Al. Remember, he is the most important person in your life.”

I was still frustrated. I had too much to do as it was, and now I had to paint a duck painting. I needed some quick answers. I was still stewing on the fact that people my age have time to do nothing, they are going on cruises, going out to lunch, reading a book and my life is speeding up and I can’t keep up with it. The faster I go, more is expected of me. Something has to give.

In a quiet moment, I finally settled down in who I am and the Spirit in me. I can trust the Lord to move on me to do the things He has required me to do. If He sends some one along who wants to learn how to paint, then the Provision is in my presence and there is definite purpose.  It’s not how I’ve evolved but who the Lord brings into my life that I might bless them.  Isn’t that what it is all about?

For those who God has given much, He requires much. He does not require anything He hasn’t given. It is not the answer I wanted to hear, but I know there is purpose in it and that purpose has eternal value.

I just wrote another article, and I got a lot of frustration off my mind.  Thanks for reading. The ducks are waiting, but that is another story for another time.

Final Brush stroke! Move in the Spirit. Trust the Provision in your presence. What you thought was something you once did, might be that very thing to move you into your current possibility. Anyway, that’s what they tell me.